Tuesday, December 17th 2013

Today was a little more difficult than other days around lunch time, but I made it through!

Granted, it wasn’t a day filled with a lot of variety, I didn’t make any BAD eating choices.

I have training classes at work all this week, so my breakfasts have to be something quick and easy.

For lunch I was planning on grabbing a salad or wrap or something on my way to my actual work to make up some hours…but since my supervisor asked me to wait until 1:45 to clock in, I ventured in to town and got a sandwich.
It was a bit higher in calories than I would have liked, but it was a very good sandwich with avocado and turkey…and even some low fat cheese.

Anywho…I wasn’t expecing to work a full day at work since I had training that morning, but due to some call-ins and requests to leave early, I stayed my full shift.
Luckily I had some sunchips that I brought from home in case I got hungry at training, but I never ate them.
So I ate my sunchips at work as a super late snack, and ate a spicy alfredo frozen healthy meal dinner thing when I got home.

Not my best day as far as fresh foods, but I stayed away from chocolate!

Monday, December 16th 2013

My best day yet!

I never felt tempted to eat bad foods, plus I went to the gym with my husband after I spent all day cleaning the house!

I’m pretty proud of myself, and I hope that I will have more days to come like this.

After the last few days, the scale says I’m down 3 pounds, but I know that was all like…water weight and whatnot. I’m weighing every day just to get used to the little fluctuations, but I’m only “logging” it once a week. So every Friday will be my “it counts” day.

I wonder if part of my success of no junk food yesterday was because I was off from work, so I wasn’t tempted by the goodies the girls at work were eating.
Who knows.

Christmas is a week away, and all the gatherings start soon.
That’s what worries me.
No matter if I’m trying to lose weight or not, my father-in-law always piles a ton of food on to my plate, and none of it healthy. My husband comes from a little larger of a family, and my father-in-law is always telling me I’m too thin.It’s hard for me to tell him no, because before I can get out a protest, the food is on my plate, and I feel guilty throwing it away.

Luckily my mother-in-law is on the road to maintaining her 50+ pound weight loss, so I’m not so worried about brunch at her house.

Alas, it was a good day, and instead of worrying about future days, I’ll just take it one step at a time, one meal at a time.

Sunday, December 15th 2013

So, day three was better than day two still.Maybe each day will get slightly, progressively better.

Breakfast wasn’t as filling as I would have liked it to be, and I’m not sure how to take that. Sure I probably should have had something more filling than oatmeal and Greek yogurt, but I’m not too keen on cooking a ton just yet because I know my tenancies to overeat.

Lunch was a failure too in the matter of keeping me full.
Calorie wise, I was fine, but I think I need to find some more filling foods to eat.

Come dinnertime, it felt like I had just eaten a snack rather than a meal.

For some reason, hunger reared its ugly head at me today, and I did not like it.
When I came home from work I finally satisfied it with a few crackers and hummus, and a small dark chocolate bar.

I went over in calories again today, but it wasn’t due to Cheetos and a full size candy bar at least.
Tomorrow I think I’m going to research some fill-you-up foods and try to eat some of those, because my body is not appreciating the restricted intake.

Saturday, December 14th 2013

Day two…again, not my best and not my worst of days.

Again I started off strong. I whipped up a two egg omelet and threw a slice of pepper jack cheese, with a full glass of water.
It actually kept kept me full and moving until my late lunch!

I braved the stores and tried to get some Christmas shopping done today, though ended up shopping more for myself than anyone else.
Though I did manage to snag a pea coat that I like! I’ve wanted one for a year now.
But alas, we’re not here to talk about my shopping habits. I’m posting about my eating habits!

So I swung by WalMart to grab a healthy lunch and dinner since I’d be eating both at work tonight.
I figured some salads, fruit, pretzels and hummus would work out OK!

So for lunch I wolfed down one of the salads and some apples with a caramel dip, then snacked on a banana a few hours later.

And again, work proved to be my downfall.

One of the girls at work was having an extremely bad day, so one of the other girls bought her a bag of Cheeto’s…only, she bought her the jalapeno flavor, and she doesn’t like jalapenos. Do what does she do, but give it to me, knowing I DO like this flavor.
One chip, two chip, three chip, gone.They’re right about mindlessly eating in front of the TV or computer…it’s dangerous. It lead me to eat a whole snack-ish sized bag of Jalapeno Cheetos. 640 calories…mindlessly inhaled. *le sigh*

Dinner was good again…more salad, plus my pretzels and hummus, which I shared with the office.
The girl that was having the bad day didn’t care for the hummus, not so much because of flaroving as texture. One of the guys at work tried it though and I’m pretty sure he threw up. He said it tasted like expired garlic. I disagree…but to each his own. I don’t like pickles or sauerkraut and other people do…

So…again…not the best of days, not the worst of days.

On the plus side, I was down 2 pounds on the scale since yesterday, but I’m not officially counting my weight again until next Friday.
Friday will be my weight day.

Hopefully tomorrow my will power will be stronger!

Off to drink another glass of water, then head to bed!

December, Friday 13th 2013

Day one of my journey..Not my best, not a total failure.

I started the day off really motivated and rearing to go. I whipped up a healthy breakfast of oatmeal with some cinnamon tossed in, Greek yogurt, and a cuties orange, plus a full glass of water.
Not bad! I felt full and pretty good.
Come lunchtime, I scarfed down a Lemon Pepper tuna creations package (the one with the canned tuna and crackers) and some apples and peanut butter. Woo! Go me!

Then came work…my biggest downfall.
I work at a desk, with women that pay no heed to the healthiness of their food.
I packed myself some pita bread, hummus, pretzels, crackers and a cheesestick. It satisfied me for a little while, but it wasn’t enough.
One of the girls had a chocolate bar, and it had caramel in it! My biggest candy downfall! So…I ate some. =(
Shame on me…I know, but…it could have been worse. I’m not chalking it up to a loss, because I know I can do better, and I know my resistance and will power just need some dusting off.

So, the drive home had my stomach in rumbleys. I grabbed some more pita bread and hummus, and popped open a 100 calorie pack of Special K brownie bites.
I know I shouldn’t have rewarded myself after eating chocolate at work…but I did anyway.

I’m upset at myself for eating the chocolate without hesitation, and I wish I had said no. But I didn’t, so I can’t do anything now except move past it and do better tomorrow.

I know I’m making excuses, but I didn’t work out today. It’s too cold to run outside, and the wellness center at my school has closed for winter break.
Excuses excuses…
I have a Wii with Zumba…I have little 5lb and 1lb wrist weights…I could do some home workouts.

At least I know I’m making excuses, and I know that I’m only human and am not going to throw in the towel after a non-perfect day.

Today was the first step in a long journey.
I will make it.

Friday the 13th… As good a day as any to start over!

So it’s Friday the 13th…and I’m at the highest weight I’ve been in YEARS. And I do mean YEARS. According to my LoseIt App, it’s been like 3-4 years since I’ve been as heavy as I am right now.

That’s depressing.

All the hard work I put in over the years is gone, because I decided that I really DID want that cheeseburger, and because I decided that I wanted a second or third helping of taquitos or chicken strips, or french fries.

No more. I’m very upset with myself, but, alas, there is nowhere to go from here except down (in weight that is).

So here I am…Day 1 of my return to weight loss.
I think something beneficial for me to do, will be to write up a little blog on here every day to keep me motivated. Most everyone that follows me here is a stranger to me, so maybe that will make it easier for me to pour my heart out on difficult days, where I either really wanted that cupcake, or I caved in and I ate it.
I find it near impossible to admit those things to my husband because he thinks I do so well with my health and my weight and I don’t want to disappoint him.

So here we go!
I’ll post up a little “how it went” blog at the end of the day, and we’ll see how well I do.

Fingers crossed that I can make it this time!
I’ve got a 40 lb weight loss goal.
Will you be my cheerleader?